aliecat

NAME: allison nicole

AGE: 24

SEX: female

LOCATION: upper west side, nyc

OCCUPATION: cast member in a off-broadway theatre production

1. Have you ever thrown up in a car?

Allison: I've thrown up out of a car window. That was unsuccessful. 

Me: In what way? Backsplash?

Allison: Backsplash. Wind is a bitch. You gotta make sure you puke behind you.

Me: What color was it?

Allison: I couldn't see. We were driving too fast, thats how I roll, what a gross question. Who wants to know what color it is, I imagine it was the color of vodka. 

Me: So, clear?

Allison: All clear.

Me: Honestly, that doesn't sound so gross.

Allison: Neither does a cum shot to the face, but it is. 

Me: Again, maybe not that gross.

Allison: I prefer proactive.

Me: On your face?

Allison: Yes.

2. When you hear  the word "powerhouse", what comes to mind?

Allison: Bench pressers thighs. He-man thighs.

Me: That's what comes to your mind when I say powerhouse?!

Allison: Yea, is that weird?

Me: I guess not.

Allison: Next question, please.

3. I ate an entire cheese plate with crackers, two different kinds of hummus and turtle soup ice cream last night and I'm feeling slightly depressed about this. Do you have any advice?

Allison: Master cleanse until all that cheese runs out of you like a fondue. I'm sorry that's so gross.

Me: Haha I've done the master cleanse before.

Allison: Me too, I barfed. Are you gonna ask me what color it was?

Me: Sure.

Allison: It was the color of cayenne pepper and it burned.

Me: Did it come out of your nose?

Allison: Yeah, it cleared my sinuses better than wasabi or Mucinex. I recommend  barfing cayenne pepper if you feel stuffy.

Me: Noted. 

4. When I was 8 my dad told me to never get a tongue ring, that they're disgusting and while maybe trendy they symbolize sexual promiscuity. What are your thoughts on this statement?

Allison: I don't agree with that. I think it symbolizes douchebagness but my sister got a tongue ring when she was 17 and my mom cried for weeks periodically saying while sobbing, "how are you going to get into college?". I was 12, it made quite an impression on me. Now, when I see girls with tongue rings I think they didn't go to college. 

Me: So, would you ever get a tongue ring?

Allison: No.

Me: But would you ever date someone with a tongue ring?

Allison: Hell yea, that shits awesome.

5. Coffee, blow, or diet coke?

Allison: Adderall and a diet coke. That shit gives me major dry mouth. 

Me: I like your moves.