fannynelson

NAME: tiffany nelson

AGE: 27

SEX: female

LOCATION: west harlem, manhattan

OCCUPATION: bartender/comedian/singer

1. How much bling is too much?

Tiffany: You're asking the wrong person that question. If you over accessorize, earrings, necklaces, bracelets, rings, watches, anklet bracelets, belly chains, toe rings, it's too much. 

Me: So, how many toe rings do you own?

Tiffany: I don't know exactly but a few. They look cute with sandals and evening sandals that show off the foot. 

Me: Evening sandals and toe rings that sounds like a victorious combination.

2. If we had an arm wrestling contest who do you think would win?

Tiffany: I would.

Me: Have you seen these guns?

Tiffany: I'm not impressed. Ohh Yahtzeeee!

3. Is the ass really the new boobs?

Tiffany: Totally.

Me: Why?

Tiffany: Because I don't have boobs and I have an ass. Ohh Yahh! You can do more things with an ass. You can make a sandwich and an ass looks better in jeans than cleavage. 

Me: Apple bottom jeans?

Tiffany: Boots with the fur?

4. Do you have "daddy issues"?

Tiffany: Yes. My dad is an asshole. 

Me: I'm sorry. Did he touch you inappropriately?

Tiffany: No. 

Me: Do you love him?

Tiffany: Yeah, well it's hit or miss. Sometimes I do, Sometimes I don't. 

Me: Do you want to out him on the internet so we all know who the asshole is?

Tiffany: No, I'd rather not.

5. How do you feel about body glitter in church?

Tiffany: Hey just do you. If it's you, rock it anywhere. 

Me: Come on! Give me a little more.

Tiffany: I said rock it anywhere. As long as it's tasteful. Just don't accentuate your breasts or vagina and maybe something in the shape of a cross would be nice.

Me: Really? I think some glitter on the breasts at church could be a terrific ad for JC.

Tiffany: You would.